Archive for July, 2011

So I know that vegan chilis are vastly different. Even the same recipes can turn out totally different from one time to another. The best chili I ever made was from the excellent cookbook “Please Don’t Feed The Bears”. I couldn’t find my copy, so I picked one at random from a different cookbook. I think it’s going to need a lot of doctoring.

I went to a Beginning Hoopdance class today, which was excellent. It was two hours long. At my current size/condition, I have to take lots of breaks, but it was still at least a solid hour of great exercise and fun. If you are in the Bay Area, Nicole Wong from Cherry Hoops is a wonderful teacher.

AND, our ebay score of 13 Twilight Zone Magazines from the 80s came today. Yay!


In case you are a new reader, I am in the approval process for VSG (vertical sleeve gastrectomy). My insurance company requires me to have six monthly visits with the surgeon, along with many other requirements met, before I can submit for approval. I am hoping to have the surgery in October. As someone who has been obese her whole life, this surgery will be life-changing.

I have a great surgeon. He and his staff are excellent. Today was visit 4 of 6. It did not go well. I had a crapload of job stress, a death in the family, and other personal problems, and I was getting over a cold. And I did not make the choices I needed to make. My surgeon told me that if I do not lose some weight before surgery, there will be no surgery. He reminded me of the requirements that I agreed to adhere to pre-surgery (3 meals a day, no refined carbs, good protein levels. No snacks.)

I left the office in tears. But I am recommitted to doing this. Not Monday. Not August 1. Now. Today I followed the guidelines. I’m used to eating much differently, and I’m hungry. I will get used to this. I am tracking my calories, and I am NOT starving. I am also really lucky to have the support of my dear husband, who is doing this with me. Posting to my blog is part of my process. Stay tuned, and comment if you have something interesting and/or supportive to say. Don’t comment to tell me why you don’t approve of surgery.

I am also posting photos tagged “What I did not eat today”, just for fun, and to see the results. Today I passed up a delightful looking piece of birthday cake, and threw away the half a box of spicy cheezits in the cupboard. I went to a friend’s bbq and did not eat chips or other stuff I’m not allowed to eat.

Dear Sarah,

I wanted you to know that you are part of some positive changes in my life. I have all of your cookbooks, and they are the cookbooks I always use most. I am not a successful vegan. I’ve tried about a gazillion times. And even though I am not where I want to be with my veganism, I prefer to cook vegan meals when I am at home.

Lately I have not been home very much. I have a stressful job (who doesn’t?), and I sometimes let it consume me. I usually work until about 9 p.m. regardless of when I arrive. I have used the excuse that I had to stay late because my hubby teaches night classes, and I can’t get home from the train station to our house until he picks me up. (I can take a cab for between $5 and $8, but that was “too expensive”.) There is always work to be done, so I sat night after night, lonely and hunched over my desk. By the time I get to the train station, hubby and I are both exhausted. So I often have us go to a drive thru, even when I have shopped for healthy ingredients, because I am too tired to cook at 10:30.

Last night a stranger started talking to me on the way out of my workplace, and started harassing me, and following me. At one point I thought he gave up. When I got on the elevator to go down to the train station, he appeared out of nowhere and stuck his foot in the door. I jumped off the elevator. He stayed on. I quickly called my husband on my cell, in a total panic. I was so scared. The stranger rode up and down in the elevator THREE TIMES, waiting for me. There were no people around who would help. He finally got off and went away, but I was shaking the whole way home. I don’t know exactly what he wanted. I am really lucky that it ended the way it did. It reminded me of the story you tell in the beginning of “Vegan a Go Go”, but obviously yours was more horrifying. I know I don’t know you, but I feel solidarity with you. (I did meet you once!)

Today I decided to do the Julie/Julia think with the “La Dolce Vegan” book, as some people had been discussing on Facebook. Tonight I left the office at 7 p.m., it was still light out. There were lots of people on the train. I took a cab home, greeted the dog and cats, and started dinner. (Hot and Sour Soup from LDV.) Hubby is on the way home, dinner is ready, and I feel safe. Cooking in the bright kitchen, at a leisurely pace, I realize I hadn’t been aware of how terrible it was to stay at the office so late.

So thanks for being a positive force in the world. I hope this wasn’t creepy!

Jenni 🙂